07..Happy CNY???
how can my CNY be happy without u, told u before le, without u, nth is happy for me...u must be thinking, oh please, stop saying all these disgusting things man...but did u hold back a second and thought of how i feel? i noe u did, but definitely not getting the whole picture...if u were to love someone so deeply and she doesnt want u anymore, it would always be more than depression. dun u doubt my feelings about u, if it werent my true feelings, i wouldnt have told u i love u in the first place. i am very sure u are my true love and dat makes me confident to say that three words.
went back to rv after ac celebrations today, saw my teachers and was very happy to see them, esp mr choy and mr ong, i really miss them alot and wanted so much to ask them to give me counselling...i have been so down these few days dat i attempted to commit suicide but in the end i failed to do dat. do u noe how pain i felt? i noe u are having a difficult time now oso, u are feeling bad for rejecting me again and again. i wanted so much so much to plead u...i wanted to tell u today to lets build up this relationship again, but i am inconfident anymore, i cannot be rejected anymore. my mind is very very tired now, been thinking of ways to salvage this relationship but its not enough if i am the only one putting in the effort. u said dat even if i found back ur feelings, it wun be the same as the past anymore. i noe it may be true, but i just dun wanna give up...two years of relationship u noe...we have been through so many arguments and obstacles, why cant u let me go thru this with u again? i noe if u are reading the blog now u will be quite pissed off and dun wanna read on anymore...its ok, i noe i sound irritating to u now but i just wanna express my deepest feeling in this blog, if not i dunno wad i will do...
went to play pool after dat, was feeling much much worse..my heart felt so sour dat i cant stand it anymore and yini pei me out and we talked...she cried...i wanted so much to comfort her but i dunno how to...went back to the place and i felt even worse...want to break down liao, but guess u chose to leave me alone and let yini cheer me up ba...it was so cold dere, i was shivering like hell and wanted so much to hug u and enjoy the warmth in u...its impossible anymore...everything has ended....i left early is coz i planned to give u a surprise by waiting for u to send u home coz i am very worried for u...its raining and somemore still got thunder and lightning, i am worried that u might get drenched and so i wanted to wait for u...looks like deres no telepathy between us huh....waited for 45 mins and u didnt appear den yini told me u went home with rj....was in a big disappointment...hurt once again....u stabbed my heart once again without knowing it...den i have no other choice but to walk home, in the rain....yini gave me a punch when we were playing...i told her to punch and she did it, it starts to bleed....pain but at least it can ease my pain in the heart...
i am so depressed now...having the thought of death again...i cannot live without u...i cannot afford to lose u...but u chose to say everything's over now and u chose to leave it behind and hurt me so much so much....is our relationship dat weak? tears welled again...u tore me apart and u are tearing me into more and more pieces...
dun think anything i say will make u change ur mind now ba...i was always hoping for miracle to happen but the God has chosen not to give it to me...on this very day....i just wanna tell u dat... u are my one and only girl i like, no way for me to fall in love with other girls, coz i know and i am very certain dat i love u.....
went back to rv after ac celebrations today, saw my teachers and was very happy to see them, esp mr choy and mr ong, i really miss them alot and wanted so much to ask them to give me counselling...i have been so down these few days dat i attempted to commit suicide but in the end i failed to do dat. do u noe how pain i felt? i noe u are having a difficult time now oso, u are feeling bad for rejecting me again and again. i wanted so much so much to plead u...i wanted to tell u today to lets build up this relationship again, but i am inconfident anymore, i cannot be rejected anymore. my mind is very very tired now, been thinking of ways to salvage this relationship but its not enough if i am the only one putting in the effort. u said dat even if i found back ur feelings, it wun be the same as the past anymore. i noe it may be true, but i just dun wanna give up...two years of relationship u noe...we have been through so many arguments and obstacles, why cant u let me go thru this with u again? i noe if u are reading the blog now u will be quite pissed off and dun wanna read on anymore...its ok, i noe i sound irritating to u now but i just wanna express my deepest feeling in this blog, if not i dunno wad i will do...
went to play pool after dat, was feeling much much worse..my heart felt so sour dat i cant stand it anymore and yini pei me out and we talked...she cried...i wanted so much to comfort her but i dunno how to...went back to the place and i felt even worse...want to break down liao, but guess u chose to leave me alone and let yini cheer me up ba...it was so cold dere, i was shivering like hell and wanted so much to hug u and enjoy the warmth in u...its impossible anymore...everything has ended....i left early is coz i planned to give u a surprise by waiting for u to send u home coz i am very worried for u...its raining and somemore still got thunder and lightning, i am worried that u might get drenched and so i wanted to wait for u...looks like deres no telepathy between us huh....waited for 45 mins and u didnt appear den yini told me u went home with rj....was in a big disappointment...hurt once again....u stabbed my heart once again without knowing it...den i have no other choice but to walk home, in the rain....yini gave me a punch when we were playing...i told her to punch and she did it, it starts to bleed....pain but at least it can ease my pain in the heart...
i am so depressed now...having the thought of death again...i cannot live without u...i cannot afford to lose u...but u chose to say everything's over now and u chose to leave it behind and hurt me so much so much....is our relationship dat weak? tears welled again...u tore me apart and u are tearing me into more and more pieces...
dun think anything i say will make u change ur mind now ba...i was always hoping for miracle to happen but the God has chosen not to give it to me...on this very day....i just wanna tell u dat... u are my one and only girl i like, no way for me to fall in love with other girls, coz i know and i am very certain dat i love u.....
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