15..stop asking me..

will u all stop asking me why she is always with guys, esp rui jie...who she wanna be is her own business, dun relate her to me anymore...its OVER BETWEEN US!!! i am hurt enough, dun say things dat will hurt me further, if u wanna noe why she is always with guys, i tell u, she thinks dat she can get along better with guys than girls, satisfied? ya, i noe she's weird, dun have to tell me dat...wad she wanna do and who she wanna be with is none of my business...wad i noe is dat i will nvr forgive her for hurting me so deeply...saying all these hurts me u noe...ppl keep on asking me why is she always with rui jie or tell me dat she is so close to jaymond, have u all thought how i would feel...yes, i am jealous, but it makes me feel so painful deep in my heart and i will feel emotional...do u all noe all these? wadeva...i have told myself and convinced myself dat dere is no u-turn to it, i have gradually accepted the fact dat she has left me...

was very angry this morning, she says dat we can still be friends but she wants to talk to me and sort things between us..so i told her dat we go to sch tgt and she can tell me on the bus, but throughout the bus, she just kept quiet, i thought she wants to go to the bleachers to talk but in the end it was not and she just said a 'bye' to me....FUCK!! IF U DUN WANT TO SAY DEN DUN WASTE MY TIME...! wait till u really have things to say den u tell me and if u want to tell me u better not keep quiet...i noe u are hurt too...i noe u are unhappy, u are oso upset...u go and ask urself, have u really treated me as ur friend? i dun think so, u rather have friends like rj or jaymond...u dunno how painful i feel everytime i think of u...u dunno how deep u have hurt me...one word from u and everything ended...haix...forget it...

well, enough of all those unhappy and mushy stuff, lets talk about happy stuff...hmm, think i am gonna miss kee lui and wang zhi after they go to nj next week...i really treated them as my close friends...feel so upset dat they are leaving...nvm, do rmb to visit us often kae? lol...today had pe...hahax...same old stuff...no kick....not tough for me...hahax...kai wan siao...i am a CI u noe...hahax...but had stitch when i was running but who cares...heck, continue to run manx....den after the pe it got worse but again heck...went to swim with terry, lester and melvin...swim halfway den it starts to rain...heck again...swim in the rain, cool manx...

the only thing dat can made me happy now is to be involved in np activities..i love going for np coz i like to share my experiences and knowledge with my NCOs and cadets...looking forward to the itc...can spend 24hrs in np...WOW!!! I LOVE IT!!! hahax...i am mad towards np manx...dat is wad i call passion...I LOVE NP!!! another thing i like about np is its uniform, hahax..i really feel very smart when i'm wearing my CI uniform lor...esp the peak cap, looks so cool...cant wait for fri to come...


P.S. cadets! pls rmb to prepare ur uniform well for fri's act coz i will be checking ur u and returning ur badges..jiayoux!!



kae..gotta go and prepare for my physics test tmr...=D