18..medicine...

feeling emo now..just asked her if she is happy today...yep, she said she was...dats great...this break up was sth dat might be good for her coz she have one less thing to worry about, but for me it wasnt a good thing, i find no motivation to study...just laze around the moment i came home..just now my mei told me she sprained her ankle, told her to see a doc but she say she dun like to see doc, she dun like to eat medicine...at dat point in time, sth appear in my mind..yep...it was her..it reminds me of wad she said to me..everytime she is sick, she will refuse to see a doc coz she dun like to eat medicine, suddenly miss her so much...why cant i just get over all these things? i felt terrible, i want to vent out all the unhappiness and anger but how? i want to shout...i want to hit...why must it torture me so much...i was so happy in school with all friends though today is the last day dat we can be tgt as a class...i was really happy, but the moment i came home, everything changed..it reminds me of the past i had with her...was looking thru my CIBTC photos, had two photos with her in my first class uniform...i really wanna do sth now and dats to hug her tightly and tell her how much i love her...the power of love is just too strong, so strong dat it can make a person mad...now i really wonder how much i meant to her now...maybe i am just an ordinary person whom she can have and not have...its not of importance...cant she tell from my sms dat i am so upset now? if i nvr ask her any question, she definitely wun reply me....save sms? i doubt so...not coz u dunno wad to talk to me...its just dat u dunno how to regard me as ur friend...maybe its just fate dat dun want us to come into contact...well...if dats the case...i wun bother u liao...just wanna tell u dat i joining mrc...not coz of u but coz of some other reasons...dun worry...wun talk to u de...since u seem to me like we have nth to talk about....

and to all out dere....stop relating me to xiang jun...dats all in the past...stop reminding me of all those unhappiness...i really want to start a new life, a life dat is stressful...but dats the only way dat could keep me occupied...i noe wad i am going to do after JAE liao...take up mrc and lifeguard..so in total i will be having 3 ccas...its tough but it can keep me occupied...sat and sun will go out and study...i'll study until the day i collapse...this is wad i wished for...u all just wait and see how i collapse because of a girl whom is so precious to me and had chosen to leave me...

had a very bad diarrhoea today...legs are so soft now manx...sad...sad...sad...sad...sad....sad...sad...sad..sad...sad...sad...sad...sad...sad...sad...sad....sad...sad....sad...sad..sad...sad..sad...sad..



P.S. hey guys, pls let me now who u are if u wanna leave a comment..thanks alot..